Tag Archives: love

My Heavy Cart

musings2.0, , , , , , , , , , ,

It’s still a fleeting thought, but it seldom fails to return

For when I pause and reflect, I see you, basking in the rays of sun.

You dance without a sign of worry, your jaws clenched into a wide smile

With a pang of envy, I watch you from afar.

The sun is shimmering, as though rejoicing in your dance

And the leaves keep twirling in this windy space of love

My cart is full, overflowing through the brim

And you don’t even seem to own a cart?

I’m tired of dragging, some things do tend to fall,

But I care less, as I’ve already lost it all.

Your charisma is strong, you notice me not

I try to push my cart away; but it stays, it stays, it stays…

I stretch my arms to you, to reach closer I try,

I touch your arm, then at last, my cart slowly fades, it fades, it fades…

– Suri

My Melody

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The melody of your voice, has always been a little too dear to me. I held onto it like Scrat from the Ice Age held onto his acron, at times a bit too possessively and at other times, obsessively. I feared that if I didn’t hold it tight in my grip, I might lose it forever. So much that it did not occur to me to relish it in the present, just as Scrat. I kept on pursuing it, holding it close, but doing nothing else to ensure its safety.

Until there came a time when I started living life afresh, experiencing new things, things I never imagined I would ever be able to do, like moving seven oceans across, to a completely new land. I actively grew more engaged in changing how I would deal with certain emotions. Before I knew it, I had stopped thinking about you altogether. The new environment had a lot to contribute for it.

The other day, while rummaging through an old, dusty pile of e-mails, I accidently stumbled upon your voice recordings. That crisp, croaky sound gave me company for a good full day. While I was nearly going back to forgetting your voice, the following week, I came across a couple more of these recordings. These ones, probably the last of the lot that I still possess, took me back half a decade down the memory lane.

Its funny how such minute long vocals of vibrations confined in your recording devices can affect your mood, your emotions. How subtly can they give you goose bumps before you even realize it. How they can cause these tiny little droplets of salty water traverse the path down your lower eyelids, through your round, bumpy cheeks, then steeply down your jaws, and then jump down on your clothes making them moist.

It makes me wonder if you too ever find such broken pieces of our memories and if you take some time out to dwell on them a little, and try to fit those pieces together along with the salty water doubling up as glue. If you too cherish the times, while listening to the same old songs that we both loved listening to. If you too would want to go back to those moments and live in the melody of our love, if only for a few more minutes?

– Suri

Love & Misadventure by Lang Leav

Book Review, Fiction, , , , , , , , , , ,

Book Title: Love & Misadventure

Written and Illustrated by: Lang Leav

Published: 26th April, 2013

Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing

Pages: 163

Genre: Poetry

My Ratings: 3/5 🌟

Backstory: I was first introduced to Lang Leav’s poetry about 5 years ago when I came across her Facebook posts. They were so lovely to read. I would read those snippets and could easily relate to them. But then I stopped logging onto Facebook every so often- and after a while, I stopped entirely. Slowly I forgot all about her writings. Years later, one fine day while exploring some books at a local second-hand book stall, I came across her book! It’s an original copy, printed in the US but I got it for such a cheaper deal that it made my day!

Review:

This book is divided in three sections; Misadventure, The Circus of Sorrows and Love. The three sections of the book, flows beautifully and perfectly one into the other, forming a story. The writer speaks about beginnings, endings, love, hurt, confusion, trust, betrayal, past, sadness; basically every element within a relationship. She tries to bring positivity even within the hurt. Some of the poems – or should I say, ‘snippets’ – are very raw; instead of relying on false hopes, she states the facts in a very practical manner.

I’ll accept that haven’t read much of poetry, so I do not have a firm ground to compare this book with.

One of the poems in this book that I really loved: It is titled – ‘Some Time Out’

“The time may not be prime for us, though you are a special person. We may be just two different clocks, that do not tock, in unison.”

— Suri

What is your definition of love? What does love mean to you? Do suggest me some poetry books.

Quarantine Musings #2

COVID-19, musings, poems, random thoughts, , , , , , , , , ,

Some state, “You’re lucky”,

But I feel that sometimes, we’re just in the right place at the right time;

When we trust the process, nature gives its fruits.

Yes, there are risks and obstacles,

But in the end – You. Live. Your. Life. Completely!

With the pains, struggles, hardwork

And with love, confidence, persistence;

We grow, and grow and grow-

Till we become invincible.

— Suri

What are Quarantine Musings? Just some random, trivial, light-hearted (or maybe even deep?) thoughts that pass through my mind during these lockdown days.

Just Keep Running!

Dog Days, Dogs, poems, , , , , , , , ,

I step outside
Soak in the afternoon sun
Call out your name
You turn to look
And then start running to me
I hold you tight
Cry my heart out in your fur
Hug you and share with you
All the stories and the hurt
You are attentive
You understand my pain
You listen to me, as always
The terrible things I tell you about
The weird thoughts that I carry around
The fights, the misunderstandings,
The fears, the anguish
I tell you all, but you judge me not

You silently wink that it’ll be alright
As I weep softly with dry tears on my face
We both lay down on the floor,
You on your tummy, me on my back
But huddled together like there’s no room
You were, are and always will be
The best support system of my life.

Yes, it’s been years since we last met,
It’s been some years since you left the planet
But I hope you’re happy, wherever you are
I hope you have a big and wide open ground there
And nobody to stop you, from running around
Because, wasn’t that always your dream?
To run, run, eat and run?

You showed me, no matter what happens
We should never stop running
Feel the pain and double the pace
You were magic, the brightest light in my life
I miss you, but wait, don’t you worry
For I’ll always remember the good old days
To inspire me to run again
And not lay gasping for your presence
For it will only weaken my soul

I’ll run again, I’ll live your dream
And thus I’ll make it up to you
To the days that we’ve lost
To the times that we could have met, but didn’t.

I love you, Sweety.

Note: Here’s another poem dedicated to my dog, Sweety who passed away around 5 years ago.

– Suri

Why Do I Care?

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I sometimes wonder why do I care so much. There are people who absolutely give no shit about others and yet they are doing all fine. Of course they do. The life of an individual doesn’t depend on another. Everyone makes their own destiny. Humans create their path to success alone. Yet they are social animals. They can’t be completely alone. They need to have friends, family, someone to love, someone to trust. Also it’s a very risky job to trust someone in today’s world. There are just too many complications involved. You can never tell the true intentions of a fellow human. Trusting animals is way better.

— Suri

Missing.. 

Dog Days, Dogs, poems, random thoughts, , , , , , , ,

I want you to sit besides me today.

I want you to pat my back and tell me to get up, to dust off the sorrow, to make way for light.

I want it to be like it was, in those days, just you and me, together forever. But of course, forever is a lie.

I want to tell you all those stories that you’ve missed out on.

I want to share with you anything and everything.

I want to relive the past with you.

I want to see you, to touch you, to feel your body rub against mine.

I want to play with you again, like we did then. Then. It feels so long and gone now.

Perhaps, now should’ve been a beginning to a new life, a new era. But I just can’t feel it.

All I want is to feel comforted by your presence. I want to wrap myself up in your fur once again. 

I’ve always resented change and you know it so well. I can’t handle change. And the change wasn’t even normal. It was large. It was EXTRAVAGANT!!

Yes, it was my fault to not be by your side when you needed me the most. But baby, I’m sorry, can you forgive me for that? It’s too much to ask for, but I know that you’ve got a very big heart. An heart unlike mine. So much unlike mine, my dear.

I want to see you again…..
– Suri 

Note: This piece of writing is about my dog who passed away a few years back.

Love Birds

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image

          The nervous brushing of shoulders at first, the quick glances in those delicate jet-black eyes in a while. He pulled her a little closer, straightening her curls. Their fingers intertwined themselves, finding comfort in the mess! The sweet odor, the smell, the scent then followed, taking her into some better world. The wink was..
It was magic. It was magic that cannot be explained into words. It was something that needs to be felt. To be enjoyed. In the moment. At the moment.  The slightest rubbing of fingers, tickled her into joy. The slowest crash of their eyelashes, made her drunk in love. But the hug, always the hug; woke her up from this pleasant, romantic dream! 😛

– Suri

Thoughts, Anyone?

random thoughts, , , , , , , , , , , , ,

We think the same things now as we did eons back and would be thinking the same things much much ahead in the future unless some really very drastic evolution takes place.

The same words were repeated throughout history.

The same words are being repeated today.

The same thoughts were shared then.

The same ones are being shared now.

We, as humans, as the so-called-intelligent beings on Earth, believe to have evolved much more than the other species. But have we really? Emotionally? Spiritually? Mentally?

Physically, yes. Our way of living has tremendously evolved into a – I won’t say ‘better’ but – rather a convenient style. We get most of our work done without much of those tiring, painstaking efforts. But that’s not the matter I had intended to write about.

I wished to learn about the inner minds of people. I had this intense desire to know whether the person sitting besides me in a train is thinking about the same things that I am. I wanted to know if they are thinking about their parents. And if yes, are those thoughts negative or positive. I felt that I needed to know if the lady who sits in that grocery store has ever had a dog in her life. And if yes, if the dog isn’t with her now, does she miss it?

I would also want to know if my best friend holds any – even a small negligible quantity – grudge against me. I may try my best to hide this feeling, but a tiny light shines in my heart everytime a young, handsome guy walks right past me, and I wonder if he noticed me. And even if he did, I wonder what did he think about me.

When I walk into an art gallery, I ponder over the artistic features in every artworks. I try to think about the thoughts that the artist must have been thinking while painting them. I do get a few vibes. They may be the same feelings that the artist might have been thinking, or they might be like the ones the other viewers are thinking.

On my way home, I see a boy, of about 10-12 years old, riding shotgun in a car. The car had halted at a traffic signal. The boy had a hunched body structure as he was peering down at the trophy he was holding inside his bag, at the same time anticipating the reaction he would get from his driver. Would it be as good as or better than his parents? And I start to wonder about them.

And in the end, I wonder if there are others who think like I do. At times, I know there’s almost everyone who thinks like this.

Human mind is weird. It makes you believe that you are different and yet the same.

Sometimes, I feel there’s a huge traffic of these thoughts. There must be an option to wipe out the screen. To merely enjoy the void. The feeling of nothingness. The vacuum. To get a small bit of relief from the floundering nature of our minds. But I know it won’t happen on it’s own. Someone needs to act. I need to act. I need to unclog the unnecessary garbage swirling around in my mind, occupying the space that would have been used for some better revolutionary thoughts and ideas.

And I know, now’s the time to do it. The sooner, the better.

– Suri